Surrender

(One Year Ago)
God: Your next child will come from Ethiopia.
Me: Wha? Ethiopia? Really?
God: Your next child will come from Ethiopia.
Me: Alrighty then. Here we goooo!

(8 Months ago)
Well now what? That child's face, name and story are what inspired us to adopt. But she won't be ours after all. How could this have happened?
Your next child will come from Ethiopia.
But we were so sure it would be that one. This is too hard.
Your next child will come from Ethiopia.
Ok, we trust you. We will continue on and wait for a referral.

(5 Months ago)
Your next child will come from Ethiopia.
I believe you! We have a referral. Oh, I hope we get a court date quickly!

(3 Months ago)
Your next child will come from Ethiopia.
I hope we pass court by December!

(This 2 Months ago)
We better get a January court date!
Your next child will come from Ethiopia.

(One month ago)
February then, right Lord?
Your next child will come from Ethiopia.

(This Month)
Ok, ok, I can keep waiting, as long as it is certain we will have her home by her first birthday.
Your next child will come from Ethiopia.

(This week)
We will have her by her first birthday, right? We HAVE TO!
Your next child will come from Ethiopia.

(Tonight)
This is taking too long. This just isn't fair to her or to us. She is getting older every day. She needs a mom and a dad.
Your next child will come from Ethiopia.

I am standing in the shower and I finally get it. After a year of trying to grasp for any way to control this situation I realize, this process is going to take as long as it takes. I surrender the control I never had.

Lord, it took me a year, but I finally understand. Your ways are not our ways. The timeline is not important to you. Our obedience and our hearts are what's important. Thank you for your unwavering promise that our next child will come from Ethiopia.